Slivy Edmonds Cotton, WG'79: Celebrating Life in Death
By Robert Strauss
Slivy Edmonds Cotton's paternal grandmother seemed
always to be over a stove or
at a cutting board. "Big
Mama," as everyone called
her, was never unhappy
about that and died a happy
woman, with everyone in the
family remembering fondly
the kitchen she dominated.
Now, if Cotton's favorite
current kitchen is any barometer of the times, lots of
other grandmothers were
Big Mamas in their own
rights. Cotton, a member
of Wharton's Graduate
Executive Board and the
Chair and Chief Executive
Officer of Perpetua, Inc.,
a funeral home operations
company, is a pioneer in
progressive, interactive funerals. At the most recent
convention of the National
Funeral Directors and
Morticians Association in
Atlantic City, Perpetua
showed off its Big Mama's
Kitchen funeral set. It had
a linoleum floor, a stove,
cabinets, a spice rack, and
a table and chairs.
Oh, yes, and a frilly,
painted white casket with a
fluffy pillow and "Big
Mama's" favorite accessories.
"We started looking at
Baby Boomer research,"
said Cotton from Perpetua's
offices in Tucson, Arizona.
"This has been a generation
that has changed every industry, and we found that
funeral service was not going to be an exception. We
looked at what people did
and didn't like about the
process. What we found is
that the funeral business,
like all successful businesses today, will have to create
experiences. So that is what
we set out to do."
Cotton said that while
she was wary at first about
how the media would treat
the idea of creating sets like
Big Mama's Kitchen for funerals, it has generally been
a positive experience.
"We've been everywhere,
from classic rock radio stations to CBS to National
Public Radio to papers in
Australia and Spain," she
said. "We're not used to having positive stories about
the funeral industry, but
we've been really pleased
about the way this has all
turned out."
No one should be surprised at the way things turn
out positively for Cotton, for
her life has been marked by
an ability to glide past seeming roadblocks with energy
and style.
Cotton grew up for
the most part in Norfolk,
Virginia, before her family
moved to Philadelphia while
she was in high school. She
graduated from Dobbins, one
of the city's technical high
schools, and decided to get
a nursing degree.
"It was either that or
be a math teacher, and it
seemed that the road to
nursing was going to be
faster. I was set on being
a registered nurse for the
next 50 years," she said.
But then three years into
that proposed 50, Cotton had
a change of heart. She was
offered a head nursing position and tensed up a bit.
"Suddenly, that seemed
like the top rung, nowhere
to go for 40 years," she said.
"I decided that before I took
that step, I wanted to see
the world a bit."
So she signed on with
TWA and started flying with
them, first as an attendant
and then managing in the
company's New York offices.
"One day on a plane, I
met a gentleman who went
to Wharton," said Cotton. "I
told him I had thought about
going into business and had
somewhat of a math background. He told me to talk to
the people at Wharton to see
what to do next. I did it, and
it was never a mistake."
While working at various
jobs in the TWA corporate
offices, Cotton slowly got
an undergraduate business
degree at Marymount
Manhattan College and then
got her Wharton MBA. She
was recruited into Bristol
Myers' first internal management development program, but after a couple of
years, decided that the
stability was not, ironically,
for her.
"I had been with a company, TWA, in the midst of
labor strikes and deregulation and the chaos of losing
lots of money. Bristol Myers
had a lot of resources, but I
found I missed the challenge
of working on problems of
companies going through
turmoil and change," she
said. So she went to work in
the mergers and acquisitions and venture capital
departments at Equitable
Capital.
Through that job, she
met several people who
wanted to start their own
venture capital firm and
signed on with them. She
consulted for companies in
the partners' portfolio,
eventually becoming the
CFO of one of them,
Envirotest Systems Corp.,
an auto emissions testing
company headquartered in
Tucson. She moved from
her beloved East Coast to
the dry, hot West for a couple of years, eventually
seeing the company
through to its public offering, then semi-retiring.
"By that time I had got-
ten married to a great guy,
so I was stuck here," she
said with a laugh. Her husband, Lorenzo Cotton, is an
architect with Pima
Community College, the
fourth largest community
college in the country, with
a million square feet of facilities and, thus, a whole
lot of work for an architect.
She started working with
the arts and various charities in the Tucson area, not
worrying about getting
back into the corporate
world.
Then one day while she
was at a spa weekend, she
got a call from one of her
investors from her venture
capital days.
"They told me I was
bored and needed to look
at this funeral company
they were thinking of investing in," she said. "I
tell them now they took
advantage of me because
I was delirious from that
800-calorie-a-day spa diet.
Funeral homes were not
a business I had ever
thought of."
Like many, Cotton had
negative views of funeral-
home operators for much of
her life, figuring they were
just cynical folks trying to
gouge the bereaved. But
her father died during the
time of the Envirotest public offering.
"This was a doubly
stressful time and surprisingly, I found the negative
reports about funeral directors not to be the case, at
least in my situation. They
were extremely good to
me," she said. "So when
they called and asked if I
would look at the company,
I said OK."
It turned out that
Perpetua's founders were
casket sales people, and
while they were good at
that business, they weren't
so adept at either funeral
service or acquiring other
funeral homes, which is
what they had planned to
do. The company was headquartered in Jacksonville,
Florida, but had no properties there. Their business
was spread out in the
Northeast and Midwest.
Cotton moved the headquarters to Tucson and
decided that the idea of
merely buying ongoing funeral homes was not the
way to go. She decided to
use the most successful
of the properties that
Perpetua had, the Wade
Funeral Home in St. Louis,
a long-time, family-run
business, as an experimental laboratory of sorts. She
said that Batesville Casket
Company, the largest purveyor of caskets in the
country, was already suggesting to its customers
that funeral services had
to be updated.
"I had been to a business conference and was
impressed with a talk about
what was called the 'experience economy', and the
combination of that and
Batesville's encouragement
led us to the idea of celebrating a person's life, rather than bemoaning their death, in a
funeral service," she said.
In the beginning, things were a little unwieldy. The first
"experiential" funeral Perpetua did at Wade Funeral Home
was for a schoolteacher. They brought in a blackboard and one
of her favorite chairs, putting her shawl around the chair. Then
there was a basket of apples by her desk, so that everyone
could take an apple from the teacher whom they had brought
apples to in her teaching days.
"People responded to it. Her former students loved it. So
we tried it again," she said.
The next one was for an avid movie-goer, so they had
popcorn popping and his favorite movies playing on a video
screen at the wake. The next try was for a fisherman, so there
was a set with a dock and fishing poles and people came to
sit around and tell stories about his favorite avocation.
"Soon people would come from the traditional funeral
room and look at these and say, "Hey, how come we didn't get
that?'" she said.
Now Wade offers three standard sets: the traditional funeral; a sports-oriented set with a Barcalounger and a TV tuned
low to Super Bowl or basketball footage; and Big Mama's
Kitchen.
Capitalizing on the Baby Boom experiential mentality that
she believes she has captured and the attendant publicity,
Cotton now hopes expand Perpetua's reach. Rather than acquire existing funeral homes, as the former management had
planned, Cotton thinks the way to go is to build new Perpetua-
branded homes in underserved areas.
"Good funeral homes tend to have those community and
family connections, so it would not pay for us to try to compete with them," she said. "But there are plenty of places
where there are no good facilities. That is where we intend to
go and give these updated, modern services."
Cotton said she plans to staff the new homes with people
instructed in a Perpetua training center in Tucson. She said it
is not morbid for her to be bullish on the funeral industry.
"Yes, I got HBO this year because people kept referring to
episodes of 'Six Feet Under'," she said, talking about the cable TV drama about a family-run funeral home. "Families have
come in [at Wade] and asked about certain things, and I realize they got it from an episode there.
"But it is a really good time to talk about family traditions
and celebrating life, not getting mired in death," she said.
"It is important to understand today that there are options to
somber services. Death is, to be sure, a part of life."
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